Can You Win an Argument with a Narcissist? And If So, How?

Photo by Adi Goldstein on Unsplash

No matter what the nature of your relationship with a narcissist — whether it’s a friend, family member, coworker, or lover — arguing with a narcissist is an experience that can strike fear in the hearts of even the strongest and most empathetic among us. And that’s what can drive a Narcissist.

Often, we are left feeling like a round of Monopoly has turned sour, with us snapping at ‘Get out of Jail Free’ and the narcissist buoyantly landing on ‘What’s Yours Is Mine’.

Logic, reason and emotional connection appear not to apply. Narcissists have an unswerving sense of their superiority coupled with a chilling lack of empathy, an overdeveloped liking for control and a willingness to manipulate others and buffer themselves from any perception of weakness, loss of control or being on the losing side.

Surely, these are reasonable grounds to want to avoid arguments with a narcissist at all costs. But what if you can’t? What if an argument with a narcissist is unavoidable? Can you win it? And if so, how?

For the purposes of ease I will refer to the narcissist as “him”.

Understanding Narcissistic Behavior

First we have to consider some characteristics of what actually goes on in an argument with a…